You cannot make this stuff up.
Only Survivors know how true these quotes are.
Thank you for sharing!
- “I got myself a new pair of running shoes. Here — you can have my old ones.”
- After telling him that I had made an appointment with an Ob/Gyn to discover if I may have fibroids or something more serious, he chimes in with, “Can’t they check your knees while they’re at it?”
- After single-handedly raising three kids, doing the books for his business, and taking care of the house, he said, “When are you going to learn how to multitask.”
- He threw a surprise party for my birthday. We showed up at a restaurant and all his friends were there. Not a single one of my friends or family was in attendance. At the end of the meal he said, “Annie, pull out your driver’s license, so I won’t have to pay for your meal.” On the drive home, he asked if I thought he had done a fine job of planning my party.
- I have two sets of salt and pepper shakers on the table because he can’t be bothered to pass to me.
- In the hospital, right after giving birth he said, “Don’t worry about it. It’s okay. They’re not allowing me to stay overnight. I’m hungry anyways.”
- After I’d been in a car accident he said, “I don’t really know how to get there. Can you just take a cab to the hospital?”
- When I informed him that I was leaving our 15-year marriage he said, “Can’t we just renew our vows?”
- When I asked for some blankets for my one-room apartment he said, “You should have thought of that before you moved out.”
- “When you drop (our 8 year old son) off, make sure he has on clean clothes and his homework is done. We’re going out to dinner.”
- “Let me know the Christmas schedule. I want them Christmas Day.”
- “You know I love you. You just never let me tell you.”
- “I’m not leaving. This is my house. Besides, it will just lead to divorce.”
- “You want the bedroom mirror? What am I going to do?” (With a 4,000 square foot house, all the furnishings, cars, housekeepers, nanny, club memberships…)
- “This is MY poker party. When are you dropping off the beer?”
- “I guess I’ll leave the front door open so you can bring the wrapped Santa gifts (on Christmas Eve). I really don’t know why you wait until the last minute.”
6/21/12 Update: Taken from a phone conversation where my voice was… ah… slightly elevated.
Mark: “Let the record show that Will canceled Friday’s visit.”
Me: “Let the record show that Will canceled Friday’s visit because you changed the visit to an all-day biking marathon that included Will and excluded Jenny. Will didn’t think that was fair. That’s why he canceled.”
7/16/12 Update: If they gave out awards for Narcissist Quotes, this one would take high honors.
- “I cannot be part of this organization unless I am president.” – Contributed by Amy R.
Contributed by L. Reilly:
- “I pray for humility every morning.”
- “I’m sort of a pseudo-celebrity in the Philly area.”
Contributed by jj:
- When pressed for a more fair parenting plan and support for our daughters he said, “I’m not a normal father.” During the same exchange: “Well, if we can’t afford them let’s put them up for ADOPTION!!”
- “I’m a nice person – not to YOU – but I’m nice to a lot of people!!!”
- “I never was in love with you.
Contributed by S Piva:
- “All that baby has to do is cry and you go straight and feed or change her. What about me and what I want?”
Contributed by Anonymous:
My dad, after taking my oldest son to the park for 45 minutes while I nursed 4 lb. newborn in the hospital nursery: “At first I was counting down the minutes [until time with grandson was over], but then I thought ‘No, I should enjoy this.’”
My dad, after my sister told him her dog had cancer: “Oh, sorry. Did I tell you that I asked Anne to marry me and she said yes?”