A couple days before Thanksgiving, I called Mark to explain that the kids weren’t ready for a visit at his house.   The first thing out of his mouth was, “What’s that about?”

I sighed and said, “The phone calls are going well.  They just aren’t up for hanging at your place yet.  When they went to dinner at the restaurant with you last week, they felt completely left out of the conversation.”

He laughed and said, “That’s ridiculous.  The whole conversation was directed at them.  It’s all about Jen and Will right now.”

I said I was sorry, but that they asked me to deliver the message that they wouldn’t be going to his house.

Then, out of habit, I said, “Happy Thanksgiving.”  I didn’t say it to be snarky, sarcastic or snide.  It’s a custom in our culture.  That’s what people say this time of year.


He answered with, “Thank you.”





Related Post

You Can See ‘Em Comin’ From A Mile Awa... I met a narcissist this weekend.   I've been single, now, for three years.  My family and friends keep asking me when I'm going to 'get back out there'.  I have to admit that I haven't trusted my judgment.  I'm an accommodator, by nature.  What's goi...
The Wake Left by the Controller Controllers aren't always* aware that their actions leave lasting scars on those they are controlling.  The controller is so focused on his desperate attempts at micromanaging his universe that he can't see the destruction left in his wake.   ...
Why Is The Narcissist Being Nice? "Why is the narcissist being nice?" Every month, people land on this blog with that search question. Think of the narcissist as if he went about setting a mouse trap.  You are the mouse. Nice is giving the mouse a plump piece of cheddar cheese, al...
Narcissism And Prayer Sometimes I think that just not thinking of oneself is a form of prayer.Barbara Grizzuti Harrison

Tags: , , , , ,


  1. He just can’t help himself, can he . . .

  2. Au contraire… he’s ALL about helping himself.

    But I know what you mean. ;)

  3. Is the problem no real social skills? Because he doesn’t really do “manners” or “friendly gestures”.

  4. Kate,

    You made an interesting point, and brought something to my attention that I hadn’t really thought about.

    How is it possible to be both charming and dismissive at the same time? Is that another hallmark of narcissism?

Leave a comment