You are wonderful!
You are kind and talented and smart and courageous and funny and caring.
You may even be gorgeous with a sense of style that magazines try to capture.
You might have worked long enough to get that hard body that some women crave.
You may be the kind of person that lights up a room when you enter.
You may have the money to spend on trying to achieve the kind of looks that appear in the Victoria’s Secret commercials.
You might even have an appointment scheduled to fulfill your need for the perfect nose.
You could be the youngest CEO to ever head the company.
You might be the brash leader of the start-up that is going places.
You may understand the difficulty of the narcissist’s childhood and care enough to be the one who sticks by him.
You may be the smartest in your class of 1200 law students.
You might ski faster and jump higher than any other Bode Miller wannabe on the ski hill.
You are wonderful, but you aren’t wonderful enough to get the narcissist to change.
You can’t be smart enough
or rich enough,
or clever enough,
or thin enough,
or sexy enough,
or kind enough,
or fast enough,
or caring enough,
or pretty enough,
or invisible enough…
to change a narcissist.
No attempts at improving yourself can make a difference.
You are wonderful, but you are not now – nor can you ever be – wonderful enough to get the narcissist to change.
Tags: child of narcissist, front lines, gentle reminders, narcissism, narcissist behavior, narcissistic behavior, NPD
When I realized this, I stopped doing his laundry and living around his life. This sums it up. https://medium.com/life-tips/494224e0f983
Z,
Thanks for the link…
#12
and
#14
Those 2 are the most profound for me too. Never again will I wake up a stranger, even if it hurts like hell to stay true to myself. There’s no more lying to myself about what the truth is and what love provides. When I want some fantasy, I will watch a chick flick. (I love them btw). My life has to stay real and grounded. It’s not conventional, but I am happy. Now, I am off to watch The Wedding Planner and bake some cookies. :)
Z,
I love chick flicks, too. Sometimes, Will even watches with us, and begrudgingly admits to liking a few.
and books… oh… what would I do without the escape they provide.
Happy New Year, Zaira.
Oh yes, books! If I had to give up movies or books, it would be movies. I picked up a signed copy of The Lost Art of Mixing by Erica Bauermeister at a little book store in Poulsbo, WA. It is good so far! And that is a great little town with boutique and antique stores.
The grumbles I get when I make my guy watch chick flicks are hilarious because he does end up liking them most of the time. When they really turn up the sap, he gets quite verbal about how that is not real life blah blah….and I refute with neither are aliens and end of the world scaremongers. Lol! It’s good to have differences.
Happiest New Year to all of you!