My Minimalism


13
May 13

My Elevator Pitch

 

I’m on my way to a dentist appointment.  I’m wearing a cotton skirt, sandals, a faded denim blouse and a smile.  I can’t remember the last time I wore nylons or had a manicure.  I’m thinking about how much more garden I have to turn up before we get to start planting. I make a mental note to stop at the hardware store after the dentist.  I’ll get washers to fix the hose, check out the bedding plants and grab a bag of briquettes.  It’s warm enough for burgers on the grill tonight.  The sun tea should be ready in time for dinner.

The elevator doors close and a woman in a tailored business suit turns, looks me up and down and says, “So what do you do?”

“Hi.

Um.

Well…

I guide two outstanding young people through the minefield of dealing with a narcissistic parent.   I homeschool, practice living on a budget, and work from home.  I wrote a couple motivational books for those in difficult relationships, and I’m working on a novel.  I blog about narcissism to shed light on NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder).    Through stories and pictures, I show how good life can be when brave steps are taken to leave an abusive relationship.  Creativity, humor and harmony are on my list of priorities, right after my kids, reading and sleep.  I drink too much coffee and try not to take myself too seriously.

Thanks for asking.

What do you do?”

The doors opened.  As she stepped one heel out of the elevator, she looked over her shoulder and said, “Are you hiring?”

 

 

 


11
Apr 13

Lessons From a Day in the Life of a Single, Stay-At-Home, Homeschooling, Happy Mom

“What I’d like to know is how old does a person have to be
before they get to do all the fun stuff?”
- R L LaFevers, Theodosia and the Serpents of Chaos
 

“One of you grab the iPad and look up stele.  Check out the images.” Continue reading →


26
Feb 13

On Packing Light

Meet me on the hill – the one where
we used to start at the top and race to the bottom. Continue reading →


19
Feb 13

Getting To Mindful

I’d swear my body was in the chair next to the fire.  I could see the cat curled under the wood stove.  Will was wearing a head lamp, while sitting in the rocking chair.  Jen was camped in her favorite corner.  They were both quietly reading. Continue reading →


17
Feb 13

Let This Be Enough

In this moment, let quiet beauty be enough.


5
Feb 13

When to Stay Away

The thing is, most of the time I know when to stay away. Continue reading →


30
Dec 12

New Growth

Lose weight.

Exercise more – hell – start exercising.

Quit smoking.

Start walking.

Read more.

Watch less TV.

Eat better.  Eat less.  Eat mindfully, or not at all.

Go to the gym or at least sign up at a gym, go to meet a friend and drink coffee by the elliptical machine.

Cut up credit cards.

Get more sleep.

 

What are you fixing?

What do you want to change?

What needs to be eliminated?

What ought to be included?

 

Where do you begin?

 

In the plant world, new growth is supported by existing growth.  The old growth may be trimmed or pruned to make room for the new, but the old is still necessary.

New growth is fed by what comes before.

 

Acknowledge what you have done well.

Appreciate what is already good.

Focus on the steps you’ve taken so far.

Build slowly to create lasting, healthy change.

Add on to the strong foundation you’ve built up to this point.

Keep what is working, prune what doesn’t benefit you, and allow space for new growth.

 

There’s no need to start from scratch.  There’s no need to beat yourself up for missteps.

 

Stop psyching yourself out about the first day of January.  Quit letting the calendar make you feel bad about yourself.

 

Don’t turn healthy changes into a big issue.

 

Incorporate change in small, steady ways – each day.  If today isn’t the day to go to the gym, let that be okay.

 

Take the pressure off of yourself.

 

 

Tonight, after brushing your teeth and reading a couple pages in that self-help book, revisit your day.  Think of the things that have gone well.  Think of what you might do differently tomorrow.

It’s okay.

Keep trying.

Go slow.

Be kind to yourself.

This isn’t a race.

You’ll get there.

 

New growth takes time.

 

 

 

 

 


14
Nov 12

Recipe For Creative Children

Take:

  • One pair of Shrinky Dink twin tip skis
  • One enthusiastically supportive uncle
  • One girl’s unstoppable imagination
  • Two peanuts, still in their shell
  • Fuzzy yarn, aluminum foil, a Sharpie, cocktail toothpicks in fun colors, and a hot glue gun
  • One mom who has the good sense to stay out of the way.

 

Mix together without criticism, judgment, hovering or micro-managing on the part of adults.

Judiciously add laughter, warm-hearted teasing, big smiles and ice cubes for fingers that get in a tangle with the glue gun.

Include dollops of encouragement and one chunk of unscheduled time.

 

Result:  A kid who finds positive energy and self-confidence when expressing herself through her own creativity.  (She’ll make happy memories with her uncle, too.)

 


1
Nov 12

Stopping the Noise

autumn leaves and a watering canStop for a minute and look around you. Continue reading →


15
Aug 12

Surviving Nicely – 3

The third anniversary of this blog quietly came and went. Continue reading →