Nice feels good. Nice looks good. Continue reading →
Posts Tagged: narcissistic behavior
Over chocolate milk, Rice Krispies and coffee we had a venting session about yesterday’s dad visit. It used to be that our rants were punctuated with tears and “How long do we have to do these visits?” Now the rants are filled with laughs, OMGs, “Can you believe hims?” and “How long do we have to do these visits?” Continue reading →
I watched the desert dust go down the drain and reached for a towel. As I stood up after wrapping my hair, I saw the spider. It had been hiding in the folds of the towel, minding its own business. I stepped from the shower and laughed at myself.
In the old days, I’d have let out a scream. I learned to stifle screams at a young age. The best deterrent for a little girl is to have her dad make fun of her when she screams at a big hairy spider. (Those screams inside my head were louder than the ones I dared to let out.)
More recently, I would have grabbed a shoe and attacked the critter. If Jenny had been standing there, I would have gone into action and saved the day.
I pulled the shower curtain closed, leaving the spider to crawl up the damp stall.
I got to thinking about what scares me now.
I’m not afraid to travel alone with two kids.
I’m not afraid of heights, but I do hang on to Will and Jenny when they venture too close to the edge.
I’m not afraid of the dark or spiders or monsters under the bed.
I’m not afraid of strangers or big cities or camping in the woods.
I’m not afraid of wrinkles or gray hairs or mirrors. (I am making progress on getting over my fear of swim suits.)
I’ve lived with narcissists.
Not much scares me any more.
Leaving town is easy. As you take off from the runway, you will breathe deep and relax. You may even splurge on a cocktail for yourself and a couple of pops for the kids. You will count out loud the number of days that will happily pass without the stress of a dad visit. Continue reading →
I see how you wince when I come running out of my bedroom with my braids flying, wearing socks that don’t match. I’m not being lazy, you know, I like my socks this way. Continue reading →
He shut off the blender and yelled from the kitchen, “Mom, do you think it’d work to put some of those leftover brownie crumbs in my milkshake?” Continue reading →
Last night, no amount of bathroom humor would tease her out of her funk. She plotted a daughter’s revenge – cryptic drawings on paper that would then be tossed in the wood stove.
I asked if she wanted to have a slumber party in my bed. “I’ll tickle your back. You can tell me anything or nothing at all.”
She brushed her teeth. I braided her hair. She pushed the cat aside and crawled in my bed and said, “I’m sick of all of this.”
Today she discovered how to make different sizes of paper frogs. She colored them brightly and called them Baby and Mommy and one of them was even Dad. Right now she’s beating her brother at a dice game, and when a favorite song comes on Pandora, she dances by me twirling and whirling and smiling and not thinking about anything but good stuff.
That is the resiliency of kids.
That is the roller coaster of life.
I was stirring the fettuccine as the door closed behind him. I looked over and noticed she didn’t look up. She didn’t speak. She kept her head down as she focused on her project. Continue reading →
Guest Post by Jenn
I never knew anything about narcissism until I married into a family with three narcissists. It was years before I made this discovery, and in those early years, I felt like I was losing my mind. The particular family I had married into managed to turn narcissism into a generational art, and so every single member of this family (including the one I married) thought that type of behavior was normal. (Quick note: my husband is not a narcissist. He has his own issues, but narcissism isn’t one of them.) And because I didn’t agree with it, fought against it, and generally rattled the glass on their pristine cage… well, let’s just say it didn’t really end well. Continue reading →
We have created a most healthy group of wise individuals who send positive ripples out whenever needed.
It’s time to send more ripples.
Survivors and Thrivers, please see Kristin’s comment on this post.