So now what? I know how I got into these relationships. I know what to do differently once I’m in one. I am learning new things about myself; what I want; what I don’t want, and what I will compromise on. I know the sweetness of the good parts, and I know the sour of the parts I won’t live with.
It’s time to come down from the roof. I can’t spend my whole day drinking coffee, no matter how good it is. (Although, it’s good to allow myself a couple days of spoiling, reflection, whimpering and chocolate.)
Got an email from a girlfriend last night. (Thanks, Kath — seriously.) She said, “Go out to dinner with the outdoorsy guy. What have you got to lose? You gotta keep the door open.” Yuk. I’m just fine with the door closed for now. And I’m not missing the emotional roller coaster one bit. (Guess she didn’t read the post about how much I don’t like shopping.) Even if I do drive a car with a stick, I’ve no desire to shift gears that quickly.
Jenny set up this cute little rock selling stand a couple days ago and it got me thinking. We are going to make lemonade from the lemons, sell the rocks from our shoes, and I’m going to seriously work on the book. And for the day-to-day survival, we are going to schedule a whole bunch of things to look forward to, otherwise known as distractions. Here’s my plan.
- Yesterday I booked the cruise for the second week of May. I’m lousy at keeping secrets, so I told the kids even before I booked it. Hell, by now I’ve figured out that the best part of any vacation is the anticipation of it, so now we can have fun anticipating together.
- Next week we will plant Sweet Pea seeds, prepare for the arrival of Larry the Leprechaun, and attend the Best Little Western Art Show in the World.
- Ski season is winding down, so we’ll hit the slopes a few more times.
- The kids and I will finish “The Great Tree of Avalon – Shadows On the Stars”. This fun book includes wonderful lessons about karma, tenacity, the struggle for good over evil, and a lot of humor, even if it’s a bit violent at times.
- I’m going to enjoy reading “The Girls from Ames”, “Do One Thing Different”, and “Marriage and Other Acts of Charity”. Never have been able to just read one book all the way through (unless it’s an Elizabeth Berg) because my mood changes from the time I wake until the time I hit the pillow again.
- We are still deciding on a dog. At this point, we’ll fall in love after the cruise.
- Kids are signed up for some art lessons.
- I am working on the book.
- Golf season overlaps with ski season. I have new divots in the front yard before the grass has had a chance to green up.
- And just yesterday, Jenny learned to ride a two-wheeler, so that opens up a whole summer of riding bikes along the river.
And for the inevitable rough spots between the fun activities and planning what to wear on the cruise, I’ll re-read my good words, drink more coffee, walk the hill now that the snow is gone, and vent on this blog almost every day. Thanks for reading and cheering me on. You guys are awesome.
Tags: all about me, child of narcissist, divorce, humor, life, love, proactive, survive
A book? Yay! Hurrah! I want one (at least). I want to Buy it — I’ve been taking your free and loving help for quite a while. I love dogs — I had 2 miniature poodles. They were awesome friends. But they got very old . They lived to be almost 16 and the other one was almost 17. They were named Buffy and Pepper. I am undecided about getting another dog though. Especially since I am 68 years old. If I got a puppy I am not sure if I would outlive the dog. In the meantime, I babysit my niece’s dog when she and her husband leave town. He is a 4 year old yellow lab — a great dog but kind of hard for me to handle. I wish you the best — whether you get a dog or not. They are great, but a lot of work. Kind of like men. But a LOT better. Just kidding, men.
Phyllis,
You crack me up! Your positive outlook and sense of humor are contagious. Get a dog, woman! 68 is NOT OLD. I’ve fallen in love with a couple Yellow Labs. They are wonderful with kids. I don’t think you have to worry about men, and your comment about men vs dogs. I’m about 98 percent positive that there aren’t any men in our little group, or reading this blog. If there are, they know narcissism, and they can relate. Besides, most the men I know and love think dogs are easier to handle than women, and most days I agree with ’em.
Are you planning a party for the 5th?
You remembered. I can’t believe it. April 5th. The day I left him. Yes. Independence Day. Actually I am having some family over on April 4th. For Easter. I am not religious, but almost everyone else is. Not everyone. It is sort of a don’t ask, don’t tell situation. Nothing like religion to stir up a family feud. Of course there is always politics. Have fun on your cruise. Take care of your knees. (When you are skiing.) Kiss the kids. They are sure lucky to have you for a Mom.