This chronically, unresolved stressful stuff with Mark is like a leaky faucet.
When we’re busy, we don’t hear the constant dripping. When the music is turned up loud, I’d swear the plumber had been here today. When we’re having dinner at mom’s, I might comment that I really ought to call a plumber, but 20 minutes into our visit, I’ve forgotten about the faucet.
I’ve asked several friends to recommend a good plumber. I’ve checked the yellow pages.
When lessons are completed, the skateboard rests, and Barbie is tucked away for the day, the dripping is relentless. We can hear it from every corner of the house. When the three of us are tucked safely into our beds, all we can hear is the incessant DRIPPING. We’ve gotten quite comfortable sleeping with pillows pressed to our ears.
When I’m lying in bed listening to the drip, I am convinced I need to call a plumber. I know that if I attacked that faucet with a wrench, we’d have a geyser on our hands. We’d have a flood instead of an annoying drip, drip, drip. But, damn, plumbers cost a lot of money.
The three of us looked for a new house the other night. We were on the internet, looking at new houses with shiny faucets, in new towns, in far away states. Why does moving to a new state frighten me less than calling a plumber and tackling this drip head on?
Night before last, Will got so stressed by the dripping that he woke in the middle of the night with stress-induced vomiting.
Is there any doubt that I need to call a plumber?
So we read some good books at night, to get our minds off of the dripping.
We keep ourselves busy during the day.
We pretend the leak doesn’t exist. We go through life as if plumbing and drippy faucets are not things we have to deal with.
Then we come home to the drip, drip, drip.
I’m not calling the plumber until it is absolutely necessary.
Sometimes leaks fix themselves.
Don’t they?
Tags: child of narcissist, divorce, life, narcissism, NPD, proactive, survive
I think they do. You just have to have enough patience. And enough bowls to catch the vomit. Dang, I hate that part . . . for Will’s sake.
Except for the fact that this drip will only go away for a little while unless it’s fixed. Then when it feels the need to disrupt everyone’s lives again, it will start dripping again. I hope you find a good plumber. Have you tried other places for one besides here. Perhaps M has one that understands the drip.
Pat,
Ah… patience is in short supply.
We could move, but unless we call a ‘plumber’ here, the Drip will probably follow us.
I’ve heard they do that…
Kath,
Ugh!!! I know I need a good ‘plumber’.
My default position is head covered with pillow (head in the sand).
And then when I see how stressed Will gets, I beat myself up for not having made the call.
What if making the call and starting the process creates more stress than what we’re already enduring?
It will be more stress to start with. But once you find the right one, the stress will go down with knowing a professional is looking out for you and handling the drip. No kid gloves this time. The drip needs to be neutered so it doesn’t have a chance to drip again. Always here for you and you have so many backers and supporters, you can handle it.
Kath,
I do think the ‘Mama Bear’ in me is going to have to take some action.
Will is ramping up right now about tomorrow’s impending visit.