Posts Tagged: life
4
Sep 09
An Unstructured Life
I want to inhabit my life like a porch – unstructured, without ambition or anxiety.
Rebecca Wells
4
Sep 09
Individual Moments of Peace
This evening I sat for a spell on my front porch. We are enjoying the last few days of our summer, and today was particularly gorgeous. I see an image of me hanging from the letter r in the word summer, by my fingernails. I can’t let go of summer quite yet, there’s still a bit of juice left.
I was perched on the porch, feeling like I was suspended above myself.
Not a religious or zen thing, but a brief moment of stillness.
Those still moments can feel familiar, and foreign, all at the same time.
The temperature was perfect. Continue reading →
30
Aug 09
Gift-Giving
Giving presents is a talent; to know what a person wants…to give it lovingly and well.
Pamela Glenconner
26
Aug 09
Giving Lightness
Give lightness to others. Let everyone know you’re happy today, cheerful, harmless, and un-crabby. Send clear signals that people can relax.
Author unknown
26
Aug 09
Crabbiness
I know. I know. My last post was about Enlightenment.
You may be thinking I must not be enlightened if I still get crabby.
Enlightenment is a process. Crabbiness is a part of that process.
The good news is that I’m not nearly as crabby as I used to be. (My kids might take issue with that last statement.)
I remember Mark telling me, “Maybe you should look into taking St. John’s Wort. How come you sleep all the time? You seemed more energetic when we were first going together.” Continue reading →
25
Aug 09
Expectations and Enlightenment
Enlightened people never dwell on what they don’t want, what other people expect of them, or what always has been.
Author unknown
25
Aug 09
Enlightenment
It had been about six weeks since the kids and I had moved out. Mark and I were still going to counseling. At one point, he told me that he was convinced that my leaving was a temporary thing. He figured I’d get a little space, have a chance to miss him, and come running back with the realization that he was the best thing that had ever happened to me.
He believed I would come to my senses and see what was best for all of us, especially Will and Jenny.
I hadn’t completely given up, but I knew things would have to change dramatically before I would give any thought to the possibility of moving back.
Somewhere during this time I had picked up a copy of Real Simple Magazine and read an article about narcissism. I vividly remember handing my mom the magazine and telling her to read the article. “Mom! She’s talking about your parents.”
Moments later, mom hands back the magazine and says, “Honey, this is your husband.” Continue reading →
22
Aug 09
Sit Back And Wait
Just let others do what they’re going to do. Your best strategy is to go for the old “give them enough rope and see what happens” rather than bailing them out.
Author unknown
17
Aug 09
Suit Yourself
He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.
Raymond Hull
17
Aug 09
Sweeping the Floor
I would not win any awards for my housekeeping skills. Quite frankly, it would sadden me if I learned that awards were actually given out for such a thing. I am not a slob, but I value hanging with my kids, reading, gardening, and fresh air over a clean floor. I don’t think my less-than-perfect domestic skills are a character flaw. We live in our house for a few days at a stretch, and then I hit a wall and we straighten things up and “pretend that we aren’t messy,” as my daughter likes to say. No one would eat off of our floor, but that’s why we have tables.
So while I may not get the award for cleanest floors, I did set a record for numbers of failed attempts at getting the floor perfectly clean. My ex was incredibly patient with me when it came to training me how to properly clean hardwood floors. We would have lengthy discussions (lectures) on technique, cleansers and tools. I’m sure he was thinking that even a trained monkey could do a better job than I; and if he could create a tool that even a monkey could operate, surely I would be able to get the job done.
That was our routine. I would get out of bed in the morning, he would head off to work, and I would begin the task of implementing both the instructions and the proper tools for making his hardwoods beautiful. I say “his” because in all the time I lived there, it always felt like it was his house. It got to the point where I would get this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach about 15 minutes before he was due home. I knew that I had failed, once again, and that I would have to endure another lecture.
He never raised his voice. He didn’t even look at me crossly or give me some sort of resigned sigh that would indicate the hopelessness of my attempts. He would talk to me like your second grade teacher talked to you when you just couldn’t get your a’s to look like an a with the proper curve of the ending tail.
Remember how she would patiently explain that you must make the a have that tail so that it is properly distinguished from the o? In second grade that tone of voice is warm and comforting. Coming from your husband, that tone of voice is grating and irritating, mostly because you realize that your husband doesn’t think you are any more intelligent than a second grader. Continue reading →
15
Aug 09
Real Freedom
There are two good things in life; freedom of thought and freedom of action.
William Somerset Maugham
