Grab a pen. We’re going to plan a party.
Really.
This’ll be fun.
What if you planned your life like you would plan the ultimate party?
Wait…. don’t tell me you hate planning parties. That’s probably because you think that you have to invite certain people, serve particular foods and drinks, provide a sparkling evening that will please everyone and clean up the mess when it’s over.
This party is different. This party is BYB – Bring Your Best. Whoever gets an invite brings only their best qualities.
This party is a metaphor for your life.
The List of Invitees
Now sit back and envision how you’d like to feel at this “party”.
Maybe you want the feel of Smooth Jazz, cigarettes and dim lights. You might be more B 52s, big hair and drinks with umbrellas. What about Patsy Cline, a keg and a barn dance?
The point is, this is your party.
You are planning the party life you want.
It’s not about exotic cocktails, hors d’oeuvres, and a rockin’ playlist, even though all those things will help set the mood.
It’s about how you want to feel and the list of people who get you closer to feeling that way.
__________
Do you want to invite those who generate conversation or those who spew gossip?
Do you want to invite those who could find a way to bitch about the sun setting on a quaint backyard and the laughter of children, or do you want to invite those who lift you up and infuse your life with energy.
This is your party. You don’t have to invite anyone who brings you down, unless you like that kind of thing.
Maybe you are ready to ditch the guest list you’ve been working with for years. Maybe it’s time to invite some new friends who have your same goals – folks who thrive on growth, positivity and change.
But, hey, it’s your party. Maybe you like hanging with the old guest list full of naysayers, doubters and those who can’t find it in themselves to move on.
Sending the Invites
You’ve narrowed down your list and it’s time to send the invites. It isn’t necessary to stand on a rooftop and announce to the whole world that you’re throwing a celebration only to have to tell the world that most of them aren’t invited.
This is a classy event.
There’s no need to hurt the feelings of those who aren’t invited.
Chances are they are throwing their own bash and you aren’t on their list either.
Crashers
Every good party has crashers. Your party will have crashers, too. Greet them at the door with a smile. Hand them a piece of cake, and tell them you’d be happy to invite them in when they make the choice to come back with their best.
Send them on their way and wish them well.
DO NOT LET THEM IN.
This is your party.
Enjoying Yourself
Revel in the party you’ve created. Soak up the positive energy, or negative energy, if that’s your thing. Count your blessings and thank your friends for bringing their best.
Notice how the best in each enhances the best of the others.
Isn’t that cool?
Pour yourself a drink and toast to those you have been blessed to know.
Raise a glass to yourself, too.
Cleanup
If you keep it simple, the cleanup is easy. Offer only a few choices in drinks and munchies. Keep the decorations to a minimum. It’s not about the food and party hats, it’s about the people.
It’s your life. Who do you want to invite?
Tags: a girl can dream, cuz I am Woman, friendship, gratitude, in search of self, life, proactive, the power in writing
You are absolutely on my list. But oy…that list of crashers is a LONG one!
Jenny,
And you are SO on mine. I see us making lots of cake for the crashers. We’ll send ’em packing with sweets.
Love this Jesse!!!
Meka,
Thanks! Isn’t it fun just thinking about that perfect “party”?
Can’t we leave the crashers cake on the front porch? There will be a sign with something like “We wish you the best, please have cake, but this party is by invitation only…” Even if they thought/promised they were on their best behavior, their views are skewed. :D
Z,
Oh, how I love the way you think! That’s an excellent idea!
Knowing me, I’d see their faces at the door, feel sorry for them and their skewed views, cave and let them in. Then I’d have to leave my own party.
Avoidance…is sometimes a necessity. xoxo
Likewise Jesse!! I have a way of feeling bad for people too. I am truly trying to work on this piece LOL.
Kira,
I know… at what point do we embrace the idea that we are supposed to put other people and their feelings ahead of our own?
Agreed, Zaira! Avoidance is sometimes a necessity. I like how you put that Jesse, that we “wish them well & send them on their way.” some days are better than others, but I really do feel that I don’t wish bad things on my N. getting to a place of acceptance of the past & feeling sad for her future. But she’s still not invited to my party! But you all can come if you like:)
I have made a rule for myself. If the person asking for ____ would do the same for me without hesitation, then I do it. If not, I say no. This does not include my kids…lol! But it does allow me to give, prevents me from regretting it, and provides the balance I need.
NM,
I like your attitude.
I’d LOVE to come to your party. You’ll be at mine, won’t you?
Z,
If that isn’t one of the habits of highly successful people, it ought to be.
I’m adopting that one.