“It’s about him, honey.”
“But I feel sorry for him. He’s all by himself on Thanksgiving. How come he didn’t call us?”
“Well, he made a series of choices that brought him to the point where he’s alone on Thanksgiving. I understand that you feel sorry for him. You’ve got the kindest heart. Don’t let feeling sorry for him make you feel guilty – like there’s something you’re supposed to do about the situation. A good dad calls his kids on Thanksgiving.”
Will chimes in, “You guys know why he didn’t call, don’t ya? He didn’t call because I wouldn’t change my plans on Thanksgiving to do what he wanted me to do.”
“Yes, so now you’re both being punished with the silent treatment.”
“Jen, you didn’t do anything wrong. Neither did you, Will. He tried to arrange the day to benefit his agenda, and when that didn’t work, he chose to punish you by not calling on Thanksgiving.”
Will laughed, “Well, the silent treatment won’t last long.”
“It never does.”
“Yeah, but he wants me to wax his skis, so he’ll have to call and pretend like everything’s fine, so he can get his skis back.”
Jen reached for the sewing scissors, “I hate how he does that stuff, and then I feel bad for him.”
“Would you ever treat someone you loved like that?”
Jen slammed the scissors on the counter, “Heck, No!”
“It’s about him, you guys. Just remember that.”
Jen grabbed the pin cushion and sighed, “Yeah, everything is about him.”
Tags: child of narcissist, divorce, front lines, narcissism, narcissist behavior, narcissistic behavior, NPD, Parenting
It’s all about him: a tough thing to have to learn – and comprehend – at such a young age.
Pat,
Yes. Is it crazy of me to admit that my goal is that when they grow up, they won’t waste any time trying to get love from a narcissist?